


Achilles Heel

by schneestern



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-02-27
Updated: 2008-02-27
Packaged: 2018-06-03 00:12:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6588964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/schneestern/pseuds/schneestern





	Achilles Heel

John Sheppard fights evil aliens pretty much every day of the week and sometimes even on Sundays. He goes on impossible missions to hostile planets, he flies alien spaceships with the power of his mind and he saves the galaxy every five minutes. He can shoot two guns in opposite directions and find escape routes in a dark, window-less rooms.

John Sheppard is a true hero and he's willing to give his all to save, well, pretty much everyone. But if there's one thing he cannot stand? One single thing that makes his skin crawl and his face twist in a disgusted frown? It's spiders.

*

"You're not even supposed to be here," John hisses at the wall.

Rodney watches John's back with a raised eyebrow and wonders if John has a psychotic breakdown and if him talking with the wall is enough of a reason to call Keller.

"This is a floating Ancient island on a planet in the Pegasus Galaxy. You should not be here."

Rodney steps closer behind John and finally sees the spider in the corner of the room, a small black thing with spindly legs, that hangs from the ceiling at a weird angle.

"You're talking to a spider," Rodney observes, voice clearly indicating an unspoken _Why the hell would you do such a thing?_

When John turns around and gives him a dark glare, the smirk that had been forming at the corner of Rodney's mouth quickly dies down. Rodney knows that look. It's the _joke and you can forget about getting laid tonight_.

It's the one thing _Rodney_ is scared of.

*

Rodney McKay fixes things by just touching them most of the time. The rest of the time he has to crook a finger to get the job done. Rodney hates pressure but if his life depends on it he's great in finding outrageous solutions. He once blew up a bit of a solar system (by accident!), on another occasion he killed a few Wraith (totally on purpose) and once he had superpowers (he misses them sometimes). McKay likes free food, mocking Zelenka's pigeons and being a genius.

Rodney McKay is probably the smartest (Human) scientist in two galaxies and he saves the day more than once a week. But if there's one thing Rodney enjoys saving the most, more than saving himself, the universe, reality, it's saving John Sheppard.

God knows he gets enough chances.

*

The spider is really just here by pure chance. It latched onto the boot of an SGC official inspecting a small energy fluctuation in the Stargate. Then it accidentally wound up in a storage container, sweet smell of fresh bread drawing it along.

It (unknowingly) became the very first spider to travel through the Stargate to the Pegasus Galaxy.

How it ended up in John Sheppard's room no one knows or cares about. It may well have something to do with the bread the spider slept in and gay sex on cafeteria tables after hours between one John Sheppard and one Rodney McKay, although this theory is unconfirmed.

All that needs to be known is what this spider is most afraid of is books, newspapers, vacuum cleaners and flip-flops.

Well, pretty much anything that could be lethal to it.

*

Rodney starts undressing when it becomes clear that John isn't going to move from his spider-observation-spot any time soon.

He shrugs off his leather jacket, takes off his shirt and leaves them on a pile on the floor. Then he takes off his boots, tugs off his socks and pulls off his pants.

Getting up he picks one of his boots from the floor again and strides past John in nothing but his boxershorts. He walks up to the wall and squashes the spider in one firm forward movement of the boot in his hand.

Then he turns to John, carelessly throwing his boot aside.

"Can we have sex now?"


End file.
